Well he's back :D

Hooray for Logan being HOME!!! Man was I surprised when I got a call the last night of camp from a certain somebody in Germany (hence on his way home) I went outside my cabin and jumped around a bit :) after we hung up I couldn't really sleep because I was so excited. I gave little thought to the fact that if he was already on his way then I probably wouldn't greet him on the airfield. And I didn't, we couldn't get away from camp quick enough but it worked out because he got to come over here on Thursday night :D :D :D so we hung out for the weekend and HOPEFULLY (fingers crossed) I'll be able to work it out so that I can come with him down to Sisters next weekend. That'd be great. I think I'll head to work today and see who's not working and negotiate some shift switching/giving and such. In any case I feel emotionally lighter :) no more worrying when I'll get to see him or talk to him next, at least not for a little while. At the moment if I really REALLY want to see him I only have to drive two and a half hours and I can. :) And most every night I can call HIM, that will be wonderful. I missed not being able to call him and talk or leave a message, having to wait and not being sure of when the next call will come is hard. Fortunately I don't have to now for a few months :D

Oh and by the way, fantastic four is a fun movie. I liked it. And mio gelato down the street is great! :) hooray for ice cream and gelato!!!

ya know what's yummy?

chocolate covered gummi bears :)

home again home again

with a new sparkley hair clip and black shirt, a little sunburnt but doin alright. I don't have to work tomorrow :) that's cool... but working only night shifts this week is :P. Oh well, thems the breaks eh?

I'm not homesick I'm Logansick

I'm in Sisters tonight... sitting in Logan's old room... I miss him a lot... he won't be long now :)



but that doesn't really make it any easier to fall asleep without him down the hall....

some of one of my new favorite songs

...the book of love has music in it
in fact that's where music comes from
some of it's just transcendental
and some of it's just really dumb
but I
I love it when you sing to me
and you
you can sing me anything
the book of love is long and boring
and written long ago
it's full of flowers and heart shaped boxes
and things we're all too young to know
but I
I love it when you give me things
and you
you ought to give me wedding rings...

I want to have my first married dance with Logan to this song, we'll see....

Weird dreams

weird dreams are... weird. Especially when you wake up and think they were real for like, two seconds, then it's just weird... Those kinds of dreams creep me out and after I have them I need to have human interaction before I feel sane again. I also think it's funny when you're dreaming something and then you wake up but you think that the dream is still happening like when you dream you're talking to someone on the phone then you wake up and realize you had your hand to your ear but there was no phone. Last night I dreamed Logan was at the side of my bed and he put out his hand to take mine. I woke myself up when I lifted my hand, I opened my eyes just as I was going to put my hand in his and he wasn't there. It was kind of sad but then I closed my eyes, went back to sleep and he was back :) Not long now and he'll really be back :D yay.

He's ok

I guess he really did just get kicked off. The computer crashed or something *shrug* false alarm I suppose. Sometimes I feel terribly guilty after typing a scared post and then everything turning out to be ok, but not this time I know God doesn't care and I know He's smiling not flipping out because I may have scared people or because I didn't have anything to be scared of in the first place. :D hooray for not feeling bad!!!! Hooray for grace!!! Hooray that my Father in heaven loves me for me and not my emotions!! :) Hooray!

where'd he go?

hm... i was just chatting online with Logan and he just left without saying anything. I hope everything is ok but I have a feeling he was kicked off in a hurry and with him being where he is I can't help but think that it was because he was unexpectedly called to duty. *siiiigh* I cant's see why and how I am able to choose this life except that I believe God gives me more grace than I know. For now would you please say a prayer for my soldier? I know I'll be saying a few until I hear from him again.

Holy Spirit give us peace, help me to let Logan go into your hands. I have no power to hold him here in the first place. I love you, I know Logan loves you and I just want him to be safe. If he was called away to fight somewhere tonight please help him to be focused and accurate may his life be protected and his enemies scattered. God, Help him to know that I am ok with him having to leave and that you're giving me the strength of heart to deal with these surprises. Thank you Father.
Amen

a warning

Hayden reminded me yesterday to be careful today. If I see anyone hiding behind cereal boxes or saying, "I'm a witch!" I should not be scared because it's just Cherise but I should be on the look out nonetheless. He says she's sneaky.... I believe him.

ONE YEAR

It is officially one year (twelve months :D :D :D) until Logan and I get all dressed up and our families and friends get together and we all PARTY!!! Hooray for getting married!! :D

grumble grumble gurgle roar

I'm mad... :( I didn't get my homework done when I wanted to... now I'm gonna be stressed out all weekend. This sucks... why don't I focus when I should? grrrrrr... i'm hungry too, and tired, and whiny... I wish today was only a karate day :P I just wanna go punch and kick and yell... and I want school to be done for the summer, yes that would be a good one too.

bluegrass growing in my room :)

I got a few new CDs, which is always fun, but I especially like these. I was browsing around the obscure corner of music at Target. The corner full of Irish jigs, 70's hits, country and gospel music :) I found a CD called "Bluegrass Revival" I thought it looked cool so I showed it to Dad and recognized most of the songs as hymns that he grew up singing. So I bought it, it was only about $10 for 3 CDs :) yay good deals.

So I've been listening to pretty much nothing but bluegrass hymns for the past few days and I like it. It's soothing to me, I dunno why. Like I told Jasmine it's like coming home in a way, even though I haven't gone anywhere. I feel happy when I listen to it, it's like a security blanket. It makes me think of Logan and be happy, I don't miss him so so much when I listen to my bluegrass :) I love the sound of the fiddle and mandolin :D it's real music by real musicians who know how to play their instruments. I like the good ol' hymns jazzed up a bit with some fun country music :) real country, not pop or rock country.

And today I went out and bought a cowboy hat :)
yeehaw

leeeeeetteeeeeers, wheeeere aaaaare yooooooou?

good news: I got a letter from Logan today, YAY!!!

not-so-good-but-certainly-not-end-of-the-world news: it's from the May 15th, he wrote and sent many pages of letter before that but I don't have them.

sad news: Logan's letter for Cameron is among those M.I.A.

WHERE ARE THOSE LETTERS?!?

Show me the croutons

Working at a restaurant is fun. My server friend Aaron is cool, whenever he serves in the bar we team up on rolling silverware :). He thinks it's bad luck to get married before you're old enough to legally drink the champange toast at your wedding, I think he's silly. Yesterday I was tellling him how I knew someone who got married at 17 and he said that was just like what I'm gonna do I protested saying by the time I get married I'll be 20 that's three years older! To which he replied, "Three baby years". I suppose he's right in a way, in any case it made me think of Cherise coz she called us babies.
Customers can be really funny or just plain crazy sometimes. I had a guy ordering food to-go about a month ago who tried to get a mudslide. When I tried to explain to him that we're not allowed to sell alcohol on carside (for what I thought were obvious reasons) he asked me, "Well, if I bring my ID can I get one?". Tonight I was upselling a couple appetizers to a lady on the phone we're supposed to suggest a couple specific ones so I asked her, "Would you like to start off your meal with an appetizer sampler or an order of onion peels?" and she asked, "Are they free?" What do you mean are they free??? Why the crap would we give you food for no good reason? silly lady. The best customer quote tonight was some older guy I was directing to the bathroom, as he passed me he said, "Excuse me, I have to go put out a small forest fire". I laughed a lot. :) But at the same time I was kinda grossed out and confused. Why did that man feel that he needed to make comment to a perfect stranger, a young female stranger who really did not need to know nor want to think about what he was going to do in the bathroom. :P ew.

Ok that was messed up, I just opened a crouton package from Wendy's and there were 3 and a half croutons in the package. What the crap??? Where are the rest of my croutons?

I got to hug Logan last night

I had the weirdest dream last night. I dreamt that I was sitting at my computer in my room and then (I don't remember how or when he got there but) Logan was with me! We stood there embracing each other and I kissed his cheek. Then my cell phone started ringing. I picked it up off the desk and looked at the caller ID but I didn't recognize the number. (Logan still had his arms around me :)) When I answered it I thought it was Logan but it wasn't, still I looked at him and said, "This is so weird, it's you". I know that makes NO sense but it's a dream so that's just fine. Well then Logan told me to give him the phone and he said something to the guy on the other end about knowing that it was almost 2000 hours (8pm) (it was actually 19:55 and I showed him that on my watch) then he left my room and went downstairs. After a minute or two I thought, "Hey! I want to say goodbye" so I went downstairs and walked around looking for him but he wasn't there. I went to the front door and saw a white car driving away, I realized it was him and I said, "no!". But he was gone, then I watched as these busses drove by with a bunch of guys in them. I think they were new recruits going to basic training, after they drove by I woke up. The strangest part was that when I came downstairs this morning I kept expecting Logan to be there around every corner. It was an odd feeling but I'm glad that I had that dream because it felt really good to hug him even if it was only a dream... :)

A day late but nonetheless... Train!

So my Cherisey sister and I were talking on the phone last night discussing various locations wherest to have a wedding. One of the worst being outside of Lloyd cinemas, but of course that is not as bad as getting married on the MAX tracks and having to yell, "train!" whenever one should be coming. It could be quite a hassle getting your entire wedding party on and off the tracks many times during the ceremony. I suppose the person performing the wedding could talk like an auctioneer, really fast, :) that's a funny thought picture, cause the bride and groom would have to talk fast too, and they'd keep getting interrupted by the best man and/or the maid of honor whose job it would be to warn everyone of impending doom. hahaha, that's funny. Funnier that getting married in the street and yelling, "car!" because cars always have more time to stop and are far more likely not to squish the entire wedding party and guests. And that's always good. Logan and I haven't decided for sure where we're going to get married but rest assured it won't be on the MAX tracks... though the intersection of 15th and Halsey might be nice, then we can all go into Applebees afterwards and get sodas or strawberry lemonades. But I wouldn't be able to get a discount unless I worked that day, aaaaand I'm not working that day so, sorry guys you'll have to come up with about 2 bucks each if you want to come to my wedding.

I am a flower and I have something to say

I was woken up this morning at about ten to 6 by a loud sort of ringing... Well it wasn't really ringing... It was the Army song but it was unexpected and loud for 5:55AM. I didn't recognize the number on my caller ID so I answered the phone with a fuzzy sort of confused "hello?", to which Logan answered, "You should be awake! it's almost six there!" :D hooray for phone calls from my dear, sweet Logan :) They make me so happy! As always I know nothing of where he is or what he is doing other that it's really really hot, dry heat but enough to make you sweat profusely apparently. I have 33 pictures of him in my room at least 19 of which have me in them too. It makes me happy to have all those pictures around, especially when I have a voice to listen to when I stare at them. He wants me to send a CD with my voice on it so that he can listen to it when he looks at pictures of me, :) little does he know.... well, I can't say on here he might read this. ;)

Weird, mean or most funny person? Ummm... I don't think I have any recent stories worth repeating... at least none that I can recall well enough for them to be interesting. And by that I mean being able to say more than well... there was this guy... and he was mean and he said, "Can you take my order now?" but HE was the one who didn't call and parked in the carside spot and came in and DIDN'T tell the hostess that he wanted to order carside so of course we treated him like someone who was trying to be illegal about using the carside spot! How could he get mad at us for THAT? huh? The little paper tape.. ish wrapper thingys are nice, they make the rolled silver not fall apart all the time. That's nice. .... .... ok I'm out of things to say again, I'm tired but I'm just fine with being woken up if it's Logan doing the waking :)

I love you baby! Keep up the awesome work, you're my hero! You'll be home before you know it and until then I'll be missing you and waiting for you and loving you. R2G honey.

good morning

It seems this poor blog needs a new post. So here we are... I am a flower with nothing interesting to say...

I miss you at night... when distractions wane and my heart remembers it's lonely

I'm a little sad tonight, I miss Logan. I wish he could be home now but I don't have much to complain about; he's been able to write e-mails, talk to me on the phone, and I've been able to send him letters, candy, and other presents. I suppose I'm just being emotional, in any case I'm going to bed because it's late and staying up later will only do harm.

Thank you Father that your arms more than big enough to wrap around me when I'm lonely. And thank you that you are always faithful to hold me close when I want to (and do) cry. I love you Lord. Show me the grace that you've given me to stand in this time and to become closer to You and greater in my faith than I ever thought I'd be. Help Logan to see you in what he's doing and in where he is, give him your heart to have love and give love through prayer and deeds even though his job demands violence. I love you Lord, please wrap Your arms around Logan too, he's more lonely than I am. Thank you Father, for all You have done, are doing and will do in my life and Logan's. Amen.

More tears than I'm used to

I cried again today... I guess that isn't bad but I wish I was braver than I feel like I am. I missed a call from Logan tonight which is why I cried. He left me a message and told me not to feel bad about missing the call, but he knew I was going to anyway, and I do. When I saw that I had 2 messages on my phone after work I thought, "please don't let it be Logan" and the first one wasn't but as SOON as I heard him say, "Hey baby" I started crying. It was a bit odd in that I didn't feel so emotional I just started crying and couldn't stop for a minute or two. I know that doesn't make any sense but I'm going to leave it there just the same.
I just cried again but this time it was because I was thinking about the next time I get to see him and I'll probably cry then. It's going to be so wonderful, I can't wait. Only 96 more days....

...On second thought, I can wait. I can wait and I can pray and I can help to stop the flaming arrows of the evil one by praying scriptures and I can help to lift Logan up and give him the advantage in his struggle to grow in his relationship with God while in the midst of what can be and probably are very often overwhelming surroundings. TAKE THAT SATAN! HA!

"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes." Ephesians 6:10 & 11

and I take my stand.